Couples Coaching in Devon UK & Online

I am a trained Relational Life Therapy coach - we bridge the depth of therapy with the practical focus of coaching. Traditional therapy can spend months digging into the past without clear progress, I combine both understanding and action. We'll identify the destructive patterns you're stuck in, explore where they come from (often rooted in childhood experiences), and then teach you practical skills to respond differently in the moment.

You'll learn to recognise your triggers, heal trauma by reparenting your inner child, and show up with greater emotional maturity. This means you're not just learning communication techniques—you're actually healing the wounds that drive the dysfunctional patterns. The combination of the two is what creates profound transformation and lasting change.

You can come to couples coaching at any time. Whether you’re a new couple going through your first conflict, decades in and tired of the same patterns repeating, or in crisis, couples coaching can help you to save your relationship. If you’ve been trying to resolve the same argument or pattern but aren’t getting anywhere on your own - it’s time to get help.

This is extremely common, and here's the good news: you don't need your partner's participation to transform your relationship. When you begin to address your side of issue, the dynamic shifts.

I can work with you individually to understand your patterns and develop the skills to break cycles. Often, when your partner sees the positive changes in you and experiences the relationship improving, they become more open to joining sessions later.

I also recommend asking your partner to listen to a podcast with Terry Real to understand a bit more about the RLT approach which is very different to other forms of therapy. This recent one with Mel Robbins is great.

Most couples see significant shifts within a three month period which is somewhere between 6 and 12 sessions. Unlike therapy where you might talk for months without clear progress, my approach delivers tangible results quickly because we're working on both the root causes (childhood patterns, triggers) and practical skills simultaneously.

Most couples will work with me over a 3 month to year period, with some choosing to continue longer as a place to regulary check in on the health of your relationship.

For this work to feel truly integrated, and the skills to become second nature it usually takes around 2-5 years. The initial rewiring of the brain can be quick, but embedding the new neural pathway takes time and regular practice. Think of a well trodden path in the forest - that’s your old way of being - we’re cutting a new path with a machete - and it needs maintaining regularly until the old path has overgrown, and this becomes the new way.

Sessions are active, deep, and focused. Often you’ll come with a specific problem or incident you want to address. This will be our starting point.

I offer direct and kind feedback about what I'm observing in your dynamic, and what each of you are contributing.

We’ll identify the root causes of these issues and you’ll learn to respond from a place of emotional maturity rather than reactivity.

Some sessions may focus more on your past and we’ll do focused trauma healing through guided inner child work which will support you to soothe yourself in moments when you want to act out - (we’ll only do this deep work if this feels right and comfortable for you.)

Other sessions will be more practice based; learning communication tools together, and you'll leave with specific exercises to continue the work between sessions.

I am not a passive bystander, I get in the ring with you - pointing out specifically where you’re going wrong, and offering suggestions for how to communicate and respond with greater skill and efficacy.